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Comments
--I go weeks at a time without shaving my face because I'm just that lazy.
--Fezzix was meant to be an annoying, short, goblin-esque turd with a nasally voice who spoke mostly in 1920's American Prohibition era lingo. Once the character became more credible, I had to tone it down. That's mildly upsetting.
--Sometimes I regret leaving the military, because at least then I could curse at my coworkers when they angered me, make their lives miserable, and not get in trouble for it.
--I struggle with an internal dichotomy of cynicism and idealism most of the time.
--Both Fezzix and I hate it when outsiders tell us how to do our jobs. It's presumptuous, arrogant, and insulting.
--I hate it...when people...use too many elipses...when roleplaying...
--I listened to Bananarama one time and liked it.
--I wish that robbing stockrooms were more acceptable, like it is in Achaea. Or at least like it was when I played it eight years ago.
So, I confess, I'm against the current "rah rah, theft bad OOC, you bad person OOC if you do, rah rah" rhetoric I keep catching.
-- I've emptied out 3 stockrooms in my time playing.
--- I robbed Dexter's Delos shop blind years ago and lied to him when he asked if I knew who did it.
---- The gold, herbs, pocketbelts, and elixirs I got from that lasted me RL years (Thanks).
- I've generosity robbed exactly 1 person.
-- They were AFK - drunk and passed out.
--- They deserved it in my eyes for griefing a friend of mine.
---- I have the log and get a lot of joy from reading it.
- I'm salty about getting ran out from Spinesreach, Severn's order, the Infernals and that side of the game in general
-- This was a big reason why I quit the game for 3 years.
--- I made new friends tho, so I'm less salty than I was at the time.
- Amnesia RP is dumb and I hated it the whole time I did it.
-- That's only partially true, it was funny to pretend to be a true newb and ask all kinds of stupid questions.
--I have robbed stockrooms five times. I stole hundreds of real life dollars worth of relic items from Riluo, then felt sadistic joy when he immediately issued me without approaching me in character. Once that failed, he tried his best to use his OOC relationships in an IC manner to ruin Fezzix. That failed and backfired somewhat, and this also made me very happy. After the whole thing fizzled, I gave most of the stuff back.
---The only reason I gave any of it back was a strange mixture of pity and smugness. I felt like I won, and I wasn't going to use most of the stuff for myself. I almost fed it all to a humgii.
-I wish I could make a Shadow-side version of Coryn, complete with arties and all. The only thing stopping me is my current financial situation.
A. Hates me/my character, the world MUST be against me
or
B. Avoids me/my character
--- This probably stems from caring too much and a strong case of paranoia (?) and the natural desire to please as many people as possible/be a reputable person.
----- I have RP anxiety. Even with a very established character, I have a great bit of difficulty interjecting myself to make new connections with new people. Even acquaintances.
- I strongly feel that interrupting someone else's RP and trying to join in on is very rude, so I try not to ever do it. But I also really WANT to be apart of it, and get really sad when I'm never included.
-- I thrive on praise and respect, which is probably the biggest motivator behind .. Everything I do IG and IRL.
--- Though sometimes I have self-destructive phases that are usually the result of (the first thing on this list) getting out of hand. I immediately regret this and fall into a self-loathing depression. (and then eventually I get over it and try and do better).
-- I've been playing since I was 14 but Nola is the only character I've ever been proud of and attached enough not to move onto a new character. Though I've been considering making an alt, just so that I can RP with people free of the idea that Nola is mistrusted/unrespectable. Which in my mind is heavily implied through 80% of my interactions with people since returning to the game/Enorian.
-- I came back after a while because I really love this game, and this community, and I desperately want to be a part of it, because it makes me feel good to be accepted by it, since I practically grew up here. Any other community, to me, then, doesn't compare to Aetolia's. I also missed RP and felt Nola's story was unfinished.
--- I don't wholly trust the Administration. I also wish this wasn't the case. I believe there were a lot of things that happened that shouldn't have the way they did, and it felt very personal to me, which is why I ended up quitting in the first place.
- Finding a new role for Nola has been one of the hardest things I've ever had to do on this character.
-- Sometimes I wish I could play Kaet again, but Kaet had a certain flow to her that was beyond 'me', and I can't quite recapture it. I try every now and then, and fail.
-- I'm extremely competitive in my own way.
--- I like 'fixing' or 'improving' things, but I've had to learn that sometimes the best thing you can do is to leave it alone, because it isn't always that the system is at fault (ie - Guild advancements) but that the people just aren't there for it to be successful.
- Aetolia improved my grammar. It also taught me almost every life lesson I needed. Because of this, at a young age people often commented on my 'maturity'. I always secretly thought to myself, 'Yeah well, you try running a group of 25+ people and everyone having a problem and see where you wind up!'
-- My least favorite position in Aetolia will always be CL. I loved being a GM and a City council member because I could effectively make the game better for other people, without the stress I had when I had my go at CL.
--- One time Daskalos 'punished' me when I was Herald and made me run the Cultural Ministry. I did a lot of stuff with it, but ultimately no one else got involved and I decided it was the worst ministry in existence. However, I loved Duiran's potlatch's theirs held.
- I haven't ever really done anything too nefarious to note, on Nola. But on one alt in particular, I've caused quite a lot of dissent and fuss, even though in my mind, I was just Rping out something that seemed reasonable. The lessons you learn.
--- I, just like @Toz, had a huge RP hero crush on @Sibatti because she was everything I wanted to embody in a story-sense. I don't think I could pull it off IRL.
- Since coming back I think I've gotten worse at RP, to me it feels like what I put out is really bland/repetitive and not engaging enough. This is in part to Nola being in a different place now, but I'd like to see it work, and.. I find it may just be falling flat.
- I have so many RP logs that I will never ever share, but wish, that they were good enough TO share.
...To keep on subject, I guess I'll do a confession or two.
- I've met a bunch of Aetolians, and I've gotta say that for the most part I'm ridiculously impressed by how varied of a bunch we are. Going into a meet with people that play a RP text game is... nerve wracking to say the least as you have no idea who you're going to actually meet, but almost everyone has been incredibly awesome. I try to meet up with somebody at least once a year and have made some amazing friends through that. Plus excuse to travel, not arguing there.
- I also have accidentally stolen a player's gold/pack. I'm pretty sure it's a rite of passage by now if you're volunteering.
- Despite having done this for a while, I still get a little nervous during big RP events that have multiple people assembled. You know the pk shakes you used to/maybe still get when you're first starting off? It's kinda like that, but it never goes away.
- I scream internally every time I typo while RPing with somebody for fear of them judging for it.
- Chef Yasmar is one of my favorite mobs I've ever made. I'm stupidly in love with anything Gordon Ramsay appears in (spell his last name backwards, ha!) and getting to channel a little bit of that always leaves me laughing.
* This means 90% of the time I won't get any/most meme references.
* Sometimes I just act like I get the joke so as to not have to hear an explanation or be told to look it up.
- I have dyslexia and find writing (and spelling) hard.
* In college I finally decided to do something about this -- the councilor I was working with suggested I practice writing by playing a MUD.
* I often feel insecure about participating in RP, but I don't let this stop me.
* Playing MUDs has helped me overcome this hurdle.
- Until I started playing Aetolia, I'd never participated in any sort of written erotica form, nor did I read it. My first time I felt entirely out of my depth, I still feel out of my depth.
* This is not to suggest I don't enjoy it, but it's something I prefer to do as an exploration of the relationship between two characters rather than for the sake of having mudsex.
- I am not very detailed and live in a world of approximate truths. This often leads towards utter disregard for rules in practice.
* Being a GM of a guild known for its discipline and strict conduct to rules can be very stressful for me because it requires me to think critically about what other people are doing. When this happens, Xenia becomes bitchy.
- For the above reason, I'll probably never be a top tier combatant even though I enjoy PK quite a bit.
* More importantly, I enjoy RPK.
- I don't often care about losing, despite being competitive. I will typically have Xenia lose if it will spur forward a stagnating scene or plot.
- My first Mud experience was in a world where griefing was the rule rather than the exception. It's taken me a long time to figure out how to navigate these lines in Aetolia. I often think about whether an act of aggression I'm about to make is taking something too far.
* Sometimes I get drunk and don't care.
- I have a few alts, but none that get played with any consistency.
- My ultimate dream for Xeniawould be going rogue with a Templar and Sentinel to form the Seluno Bros. gang. We'd be highway robbers and would cause chaos in lessers until we were paid not to.
* I think this would be considered too troll and would get snuffed out fast and that makes me sad.
- I'm kind of weird about how my clothing is ordered to the point where I create remove;drop;take;wear;attire lines for every single piece of clothing so I can order them properly on my description, like so.
- I still kind of want to mudsex sometimes. Not to the point where I'm slutting it up with random people, but it's just that I have way more fun doing it than I should.
- I have a male alt, but I have a really hard time playing him like a male. The personality just seems so bland and I have no idea how to improve it without silly gimmicks!
Please.. for the love of everything/everyone in Aetolia (except @Draiman, nobody likes him
- I have taken liberties with the deku scrub design, giving him additional things, those additions are up to you all to figure out.
- Xandren is my first lifer alt that has existed for more than 5 minutes. You all know the reasons why if you check my self-affirmation page.
- I am a self-affirmation post whore, I want people to look and post to that page, and it saddens me nobody does so.
- I'm also an rp whore myself, pvp is backseat to it, though I do want to learn more so that the last time I spent an extended amount of time here RPing won't happen again (I don't remember names, I just remember not wanting to bother logging in because unicorns are unicorns)
- I welcome people to come poke at me, because I am an oddity, and if anyone has an issue with his..plantier nature, I will whole-heartedly hide behind HELP TREANT 100% of the time, and if I could, I would have Xandren's Yeleni-chosen native language BE the Treant tongue
- Xandren used to be 7 feet tall as a rajamala, and weigh like 350 lbs as a fairly muscular cat. He is now 3 and a half feet tall, and weighs in the range of 20-30 lbs. This is intentional. Anyone wants me to explain why this works, I will gladly bullshit some details up as to why his body is JUST as strong as it was before the change, and not bother going into detail beyond that.
- the above detail means that it's quite easily a manageable feet for people to lift him up and carry him around like a babydoll, just expect additional appendages to be used by the unhappy plant-person to leave painful marks.
Edit: - I am plugging a link to my self affirmation page, just because I can: http://forums.aetolia.com/discussion/2133/xandren
--Don't think I need it
*I'd comment on Xandren's page, but I haven't met him ICly.
-MMM LEADERSHIP ROLES, HOW I LOVE YOU
--I enjoy being in a leadership position a lot
---Though, sometimes I get really busy and I'm not able to go out and do things like RP or fish. Mostly fishing.
-I've never had this much fun in Aetolia, at all. So much for me to do and I gain more each day.
Yes. >Xandren< is an oddity. I won't bother detailing why, but I also know that while I DO consider him an oddity, that is not the same as him being a special little snowflake, I recognize that there are likely others similar to him, but the fact it's likely uncommon is enough for him to be considered an 'oddity'... and no, he's not an Oddish, despite what the recently released games may make you wanna crack that sort of joke.
P.S.: I consider myself a separate entity from Xandren, and I think that's where your comment rubs me the wrong way, it makes me feel too much like "forum RP" is going on