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Worst Descriptions Ever 2: Golden Dragon Milk Strikes Again
Seir
Seein' All the ThingsGetting high off your emotion
in Echo Canyon
Previous forums had this.
This is basically a repository of some of the most horrifying or hilarious descriptions that you've seen on a person. I'm going to start with the poster child of bad descriptions everywhere. As a note, this description is from Lusternia but is still the poster child for the rest of IRE.
She is a fierce dracnari and the effects of the Taint are readily seen in her form. The illegitimate child of a Dracnari lord and her human mother, Princess Lyra of the Moon, she exhibits traits of both races. Her entire body is encrusted in shimmering emerald green scales, excepting her two breasts, pale as the moon and unblemished like virgin snow. Innocently left uncovered, they are her sole pride, as they connect her to her mother and the human race. Upon the slightest movement of her shapely torso, thin, trickling rivulets of golden dragon milk issue forth from the dainty, coral red nipples, imparting upon her the fragrance of divine ambrosia. A pair of colossal wings sprout from between her shoulder blades. Encased in silver and steel, these wings appear to be able to withstand large impacts. Ancient runes and symbols are inscribed in gold upon the metallic surfaces. While in combat, these wings can be angled to reflect and concentrate beams of moonlight, briefly stunning the viewer. A diminutive pair of wings left uncoated emerge from the small of her back. Just below them extends a slender tail, constantly flicking back and forth like the tongue of a serpent. A daughter of the Taint, her body is imperfect and covered in scales like a snake, the incarnation of evil. Growing up in the influence of the Taint, she has known no other way of life. Lyra, deserted by her lord and soon afterwards bereft of her child, died in agonizing despair. However, she must have imparted to her daughter more than a fair share of her goodness, for Laterne's eyes shine with an inner peace.
This is basically a repository of some of the most horrifying or hilarious descriptions that you've seen on a person. I'm going to start with the poster child of bad descriptions everywhere. As a note, this description is from Lusternia but is still the poster child for the rest of IRE.
She is a fierce dracnari and the effects of the Taint are readily seen in her form. The illegitimate child of a Dracnari lord and her human mother, Princess Lyra of the Moon, she exhibits traits of both races. Her entire body is encrusted in shimmering emerald green scales, excepting her two breasts, pale as the moon and unblemished like virgin snow. Innocently left uncovered, they are her sole pride, as they connect her to her mother and the human race. Upon the slightest movement of her shapely torso, thin, trickling rivulets of golden dragon milk issue forth from the dainty, coral red nipples, imparting upon her the fragrance of divine ambrosia. A pair of colossal wings sprout from between her shoulder blades. Encased in silver and steel, these wings appear to be able to withstand large impacts. Ancient runes and symbols are inscribed in gold upon the metallic surfaces. While in combat, these wings can be angled to reflect and concentrate beams of moonlight, briefly stunning the viewer. A diminutive pair of wings left uncoated emerge from the small of her back. Just below them extends a slender tail, constantly flicking back and forth like the tongue of a serpent. A daughter of the Taint, her body is imperfect and covered in scales like a snake, the incarnation of evil. Growing up in the influence of the Taint, she has known no other way of life. Lyra, deserted by her lord and soon afterwards bereft of her child, died in agonizing despair. However, she must have imparted to her daughter more than a fair share of her goodness, for Laterne's eyes shine with an inner peace.
2
Comments
(for the love of humanity, will someone please get that post up in here)
"The smell of dusty fur, sweet smoke, waiting and patience, a thing that time cannot kill. The moth that candles won't burn."
"The smell of dusty fur, sweet smoke, waiting and patience, a thing that time cannot kill. The moth that candles won't burn."
1.) Hourglass figure. If the word hourglass is anywhere regarding the physique, this is a prime indicator of mudsex alt.
2.) An ample bosom, or anything stating how the breasts are huge. Generally, if the breasts are mentioned in any detail at all, it's generally a bad sign.
3.) Pouty lips.
4.) A "perky" behind.
5.) If the eyes are described as orbs or you can SENSE SOME DEEP SORT OF WISDOM FROM THEIR DEPTHS.
6.) Lack of any discernible flaw (e.g. Mary Sue syndrome)
He is a scaly kohdon and is a very tall Kohdon, his eyes being the color of fire. He is about 6'7 245 pounds and very muscular in his upper body and legs giving hum UnGodly speed. His scales resembling that of the forest being a dark green that make is firey eyes more apparent. His right shoulder has a scar from where he fell into the ocean and he was bittin by a shark. His hair being of a black color making it look almost not there. His teeth white and strong as his body could probably chomp anyone down.
He is wearing:
a silver chain-linked onyx necklace, around the neck
loose-fitting gi pants of vibrant teal, worn on the legs
"The smell of dusty fur, sweet smoke, waiting and patience, a thing that time cannot kill. The moth that candles won't burn."
I'm just not sure what I like best: Misinterpreting 'leather thong' on the first skim-read (though considering the rest of the desc I'm not surprised), the fact that he forgot to mention his imp-horkval-grecht-troll grandparents or the blessing of Niuri at the very end.