Farewell (For Now)

Benedicto

Hi guys,

So, I'm sorry if this comes across as slightly indulgent (?) on my part, but I wanted to let people know that I'll be quitting. I've left the door open for potential return by not retiring Bene, however, i have no plans to necessarily come back.

This will be the first time in 10 years of playing that I make the conscious decision to leave the game. Any of my previous breaks have been the result of work/holidays/other distractions.

You all know about the situation with the spy shenanigans in Eno. I was heavily involved in that and it affected me quite badly on an OOC level. Despite my feelings, I was quite hesitant to step away from the game on such bad footing because I felt that, if I did leave at that point, Aetolia would be forever tarnished in my eyes and my memories of it would only get worse the longer I stayed away.

Instead I tried to soldier through and find my enjoyment once more. With some emotional blackmail courtesy of @Jory and the rest of the Templar, I resigned myself to continuing on. However, whilst I do enjoy pk, my chief enjoyment comes from RP. I found that this held no joy for me anymore. I felt angry or indifferent at each attempt to draw me into RP. I felt it had become an obligation. I'm sorry @Aloli, you must have felt a certain amount of vague animosity being conveyed through Bene as we RP'd that was entirely my own emotional state as a player.

What's really helped me come to this conclusion is an RP with Slyphe earlier on tonight. My character being who he is, I'm a massive fanboy of Slyphe. As we RP'd I can only say I felt nothing. This is not a reflection on them as they're doing an amazing job. What it made me realize was that I'm not having fun anymore.

Maybe I'll forget and eventually get drawn back. I've certainly not closed the door on it. Who knows?

Thanks for all the good times and I'll maybe see you all soon when I feel better about things.

Dan (Bene)

Teani

Hope to see you again, @Benedicto. Even though we haven't RPd much lately, it's always been interesting when it has happened. Sad to see an amazing roleplayer go, so I will just hope that you'll find that spark again soon.

Zaila

As I've always said, aetolia is a game, if someone isn't having fun in what should be a fun time activity, time to get a new fun time activity! Obviously, I think you're awesome  but I have "quit" myself over the years when I wasn't having fun anymore and life is always the better for it! I don't mean that in an "oh, you'll be back, I know it!" sort of way, just a "Do whatever makes you happy!" way.

Satomi

Will miss yah Benedicto. The few times I've run into you have been enjoyable. In fact, I still remember the first time we really ran into one another. During the old war days, when you wrenched me into a room to let a Templar 1v1-kill me.

Hope yah find Aet enjoyable again one day, but regardless, it was a good time

Eowyn

I will definitely miss you, but I get it. As others have said, sometimes you just have to choose to leave. Nothing wrong with it at all. I hope you do come back eventually, but if not? It'll be okay. Just find something out there that makes you happy.

Aishia

Miss u already.

Sessizlik

You'll be missed. I'm sorry I never got the chance to rp with you after moving back to Enorian, but I completely understand where you came from. The whole event was a real turn-off for many people and if you don't find the game to be fun, there's no reason to play it. I am struggling myself with finding the fun of it all, but hoping to get back into it again. We'll see..

Anyways, hopefully I will be able to head over to Manchester to see you play some day! That would be great! Stay awesome, Dan. I am hoping to see you return some day.

Kalinaar

Take up jiu jitsu. That's what I did last time around and I have no regrets. If nothing else you'll get in good shape and be able to defend yourself very well.

Silena

Kalinaar said:

Take up jiu jitsu. That's what I did last time around and I have no regrets. If nothing else you'll get in good shape and be able to defend yourself very well.

Actually, good advice. Take up any sort of new hobby, you'll be happier for it and feel better in the long run. Don't stay away forever, I'll miss you too.

Oonagh

I had alot of fun RPing with you via tells last night, and discussing and getting knowledge.
If I would have known it would be the last time, I would have probably come to see you.

You called Oonagh cousin and made him feel like family, and helped enrich with interaction and compassion.
Im a sad frog right now, but I hope that you enjoy your personal time.

I will miss you

Mariena

Echoing others here: Farewell, Bene! If you don't come back that's okay and if you do come back that's okay too. Do what's best for you.

Istela

I had debated a bit even sat there finger hovering over the delete button on this, but @Benedicto, I wish you well in whatever you will do, I am sorry things went so sour, and I feel a need to post. I have a bit of a bitter taste on how things blew down when they did, but it's not indicative of you the player.

I can hope you return, but if you don't as others have said that is perfectly fine as well, I enjoyed the roleplay while I got it and enjoyed the challenges presented when you did. Some of which really threw me through a loop forcing myself to adapt to unfamiliar terrain.

So if you do not return: Thank you, for making a positive impact when you came into the interactions with me. Thank you for showing me not all people at the time were judged because of what side they are on.

Kalak

There comes a time for every game when you no longer feel drawn anymore, that is inevitable unfortunately. Things slowly go into low burning mode, eventually it either turns into habit or you let the game go.

While we did not have any tangible chance to RP, from my observations I conclude that you have been a good asset for the game and it is always a saddening affair to see such people stop soldiering on. But looking at the mirror even myself , being a die hard fan of soldiering on, feel that last few months the luster of the game is lost somewhere along the happenings.

Enjoy something new and maybe after awhile when the dust settles, hopefully you will find your desire to play the game once again.

P.S. Forget about jiu-jitsu, the real deal is kendo. Could try Turkish oil wrestling too...but...well...how will you explain that to your wife when the opponent shoves his hand through your pants from behind...no idea.

Aloli

@Benedicto I am sad to see you go but I do hope you will find everything you're looking for 

I figured there was more than meets the eye for the reactions our RP elicited but I am glad to have had the chance to meet and get to know Bene. There are so many possibilities for the plot line and I hope we get the chance to build on it in the future. 

My parting wish or prayer is that you never let any one person or group blackmail or push you into a role you're not interested in or derive pleasure from, this is a game after all and it is meant to be fun not stressful or painful. 

Take care and have fun!  I hope to see you again...after I've finished the Sentaari undertaking!

Cheers  

Edit: Doesn't look like this forum likes iPhone emoji!