Pimp My Description!

Meyvitch · April 2013

He is a resilient Human roughly five feet nine inches tall. His skin is tanned
and scratched in places, a few scars here and there. He has a long-limbed,
stork-like appearance; thin, but filled out with muscle in all but his left arm.
The left arm ends in a scarred stump where the hand was sawn off, the edges
smoothed over as if an old injury. The limb looks weaker than the other and not
often utilized. He has russet hair an inch long. His face is angular with a
straight nose and green eyes.

Critique please

Natasya · April 2013

Meyvitch said:

He is a resilient Human roughly five feet nine inches tall. His skin is tanned
and scratched in places, a few scars here and there. He has a long-limbed,
stork-like appearance; thin, but filled out with muscle in all but his left arm.
The left arm ends in a scarred stump where the hand was sawn off, the edges
smoothed over as if an old injury. The limb looks weaker than the other and not
often utilized. He has russet hair an inch long. His face is angular with a
straight nose and green eyes.
Critique please

In the bold print I've highlighted the two I could see differently:
Possibly a different verb for 'sawn' - Hacked, lacerated, amputated.. Sawn just doesn't seem right for some reason.

"His left hand has been lacerated from his arm, leaving only a useless stump which has since healed over completely."
I don't think the sentence following it is entirely necessary, or should somehow be constructed into the first sentence with the risk of becoming a run-on.

Also rather than giving exact measurements for hair length, since I doubt anyone would be concerned enough of it to literally measure it, use the following: "His dark russet hair is (cut, cropped) short.." etc.

Emelle · April 2013

@Arbre: Nice. A few small grammar things:

sry4cantfigureoutspoilerthings

[spoiler]

She is a powerful Azudim with a woman's figure, the curves of her body giving her a strong, healthy look. Tattoos wind over her body in no real pattern and flow within their confinements like liquid fire, contrasting brightly against her darkly tanned skin. Tawny fur falls about her shoulders like hair, [the comma doesn't really work grammatically. you could tweak it and use a semicolon, or rearrange the sentence.] thin, with a tendency to be frizzy. Large, rounded feline ears top her head, the various shades of brown, yellow, and red causing her green eyes to stand out like emeralds. Swaying three feet behind her is a long, thick tail, covered in brown fur that gradates down to black at the end. Between her shoulder blades are two long, parallel scars, at the top of which extend wings of undulating strands [... of what?]. The aroma of scintilily flowers hanging about her is overwhelming, though not quite strong enough to overcome the stench of dirt, blood, and wet dog.

She is a dexterous Lupine standing chest level with the average human when on all fours and well over [personally, I'd prefer the word "taller" rather than "over"] when upright. Her frame is trim and lean, clearly built for speed over strength. Grey fur with an insulating black undercoat covers the majority of her body with an insulating black undercoat, the grey guard hairs coarse to the touch while the black fur beneath is downy and fine. Shining through like lava beneath cracked rock, a network of fiery tattoos cuts [subject-verb agreement] artful swaths through her fur, an occasional prominence arching between designs [vague -- I'm not sure what is prominent, exactly]. Her legs and muzzle are a warm cream color fading that fades to white on her belly. Bright green eyes are set an elegantly tapered muzzle, and gold flecks evident in the iris are evident as they catch and reflect even the slightest light. Hard grey claws tip each of the digits on her massive paws, and a thick bottle-brush tail sways back and forth behind her to aid in balance when she moves. The aroma of scintilily flowers hanging about her is overwhelming, though not quite strong enough to overcome the stench of dirt, blood, and wet dog.

[/spoiler]

@Moirean: If you're looking to add some interest, you could try adding some description to her various features (wings, horns, brand). While I understand the urge to spice things up after years, I don't see anything visibly lacking.

@Meyvitch: I agree with Natasya that the word "sawn" might be a little awkward. There's nothing wrong with it -- it is a word -- I think "sawed" would work just as well and may seem less strange to read. I also think you could vary your sentence structure a little more; see my own suggestions below.

[spoiler]

He is a resilient Human roughly five feet nine inches tall with a long-limbed, stork-like appearance; thin, but filled out with muscle in all but his left arm. This weak appendage ends in a scarred stump where the hand seems to have been sawn off, the edges smoothed over as if an old injury. His skin is tanned and scratched in places, a few scars here and there. Closely cropped russet hair crowns an angular face set with a straight nose, green eyes, [and maybe something about his lips/jaw line/chin].

[/spoiler]

Sarkis · April 2013

Lacerated tends to mean a cut, but it's a bit misused for amputated limbs.

Periluna · April 2013

I wrote this about a year ago with the intention of fixing it up and all. You know what they say about the best intentions.

[spoiler] She is a powerful Yeleni standing several heads above the average human. Her slender body is toned and her muscles are wiry rather than bulging. Vibrant, fiery red hair flows in tight, unruly curls down to her waist, the thin wisps framing her face make her head appear as if it is on fire. Pale skin is stretched across her slender frame, completely devoid of imperfections such as scars or freckles. Long arms and legs compliment her feminine figure, giving her a graceful air. Bright, emerald coloured eyes sit above her small, unobtrusive nose. [/spoiler]

Moirean · April 2013

I quite like it, Periluna. It makes a clear visual image. My only objection is "Pale skin is stretched across her slender frame," - that might be a pet peeve, though. I know it's a fairly commonly used turn of phrase, but I always get a weird mental image when people refer to skin like that and I start thinking of Buffalo Bill.

Solaria · April 2013

I'm looking to get suggestions on fixing my description. Something about it just feels off to me, and I've tried to fix it..but eh, I'm rusty.

[spoiler]She is a powerful Azudim. She is fairly humanoid in appearance, her height being the main oddity - which is roughly seven feet from head to toe. Snow-white skin spreads across her form, only a few scars scattered here and there breaking the almost seamless tone. Thick red tresses rest upon her head, the strands of which stretch to the middle of her back and fall between a pair of large white wings. Small braids spread in a random pattern throughout the locks, adorned with beads and shells for decoration. A pair of pointed ears - almost elven in shape - poke out from beneath the tresses, each paired with a short and twisted black horn. A few of the strands fall across her face, hiding her emerald green eyes behind them. The emerald eyes rest in the center of her face, just above her slender nose. Her face itself is oval-shaped, accented with a pointed chin and slightly sunken cheeks. Her neck is slender, as is the rest of her body, but is well-toned. Her shoulders and hips stretch out in a small span, frail-looking limbs extending from them. [/spoiler]

Natasya · April 2013

Solaria said:

I'm looking to get suggestions on fixing my description. Something about it just feels off to me, and I've tried to fix it..but eh, I'm rusty.

[spoiler]She is a powerful Azudim. She is fairly humanoid in appearance, her height being the main oddity - which is roughly seven feet from head to toe. Snow-white skin spreads across her form, only a few scars scattered here and there breaking the almost seamless tone. Thick red tresses rest upon her head, the strands of which stretch to the middle of her back and fall between a pair of large white wings. Small braids spread in a random pattern throughout the locks, adorned with beads and shells for decoration. A pair of pointed ears - almost elven in shape - poke out from beneath the tresses, each paired with a short and twisted black horn. A few of the strands fall across her face, hiding her emerald green eyes behind them. The emerald eyes rest in the center of her face, just above her slender nose. Her face itself is oval-shaped, accented with a pointed chin and slightly sunken cheeks. Her neck is slender, as is the rest of her body, but is well-toned. Her shoulders and hips stretch out in a small span, frail-looking limbs extending from them. [/spoiler]

This seems a little disorganized or unintuitive to read, perhaps could do:
Loose strands of hair fall across her oval-shaped face, hiding her alluring emerald green eyes which rest above a thin, slender nose and her slightly sunken cheeks give her face effeminate angles.

Solaria · April 2013

That sounds a whole lot better, frankly. Stealing that.

Edit: I did some further modifications to try to clean up after that. How's this looking?

[spoiler]She is a powerful Azudim. She has a fairly humanoid appearance, although lanky from her slender frame and height of seven feet. Snow-white skin spreads across her form, only a few scars scattered here and there breaking the almost seamless tone. Thick red tresses rest upon her head, the strands of which stretch to the middle of her back and fall between a pair of large white wings. Small braids spread in a random pattern throughout the locks, adorned with beads and shells for decoration. A pair of pointed ears - almost elven in shape - poke out from beneath the tresses, each paired with a short and twisted black horn. Loose strands of hair fall across her oval-shaped face, hiding her alluring emerald green eyes which rest above a thin, slender nose and her slightly sunken cheeks give her face effeminate angles.[/spoiler]

Natasya · April 2013

That was the only thing I could find, I thought the rest looked great @Solaria ^_^

Angwe · April 2013

Alright, time to post these two. First, Angwe's mutated wolf form:

[spoiler]He is a dexterous Lupine and is a strange, sylvan creature calling to mind some
eldritch spirit of predation. Taking the form of a ravenous dire wolf, this
creature bears an elongated muzzle crammed with too many jagged teeth and a set
of broad claws, the edges seemingly honed to a razor edge and spattered with an
unknown substance that has long since dried and hardened into a black lattice of
filth. Small bones, glass objects and other, grizzlier trophies have been
braided into fur that fades and phases more than flows, its ethereal appearance
making its physical presence questionable. The green radiance that shines forth
from the oaken ocular caverns where his eyes should be finishes off this
otherworldly picture and a pale, featureless bone mask hangs from its neck, the
dead, empty eyes of the thing eerily contrasting the Lycanthrope's bizarre
visage.[/spoiler]

And his masked appearance:
[spoiler]He is a dexterous Yeleni who bears a menacing form similar to the fauns of the
Ancient Heartwood. A sublime green radiance blazes through the eye-holes of a
pale, featureless bone mask pitted and scared with use. The eerie mask obscures
a face framed by a mass of hair moss-like in texture and of a color somewhere
between green and black. Small glass objects, pieces of bone and other trophies
are braided through the locks, producing a muffled clattering sound. Supple
musculature covers a lithe frame bearing long arms covered from the elbow down
with a thin pelt of brown fur. He carries his weight upon rear-jointed bovine
legs, the flesh beneath hidden by a pelt long and shaggy enough to cover cloven
feet; the broad claws that compliment them similarly are spackled with some dark
substance. Goat-like ears sprout from the sides of its head and the nut-brown
skin covering this creature boasts a hardened and inflexible look as though
carved from wood.[/spoiler]

Somehow I feel... unsatisfied with the masked description. It's basically just an altering of his unmasked description and I feel like it suffers in it's flow as a result. Lacks a certain punch.

Alitheia · April 2013

Oo! I want to join in!

She is a clever Atavian and is of average height, just a little over five foot.

Fiery hued hair sweeps down past her shoulders, straight and always kept

perfectly in place. Eyes the shade of a brilliant jade peer out from long

lashes, framed in a pixie like face with small lips and nose. With a slender

frame, the silvery wings attached to her back draw attention, even when closed

and drawn to against her. She is wearing:

a plain grey pack

vibrant green belted skirt-like pants

a vibrant green, stomach-baring top

shimmery green high-heeled sandals

a glittering emerald naval ring

a glittering silver tikka laden with emeralds

a vibrant green armband of trailing silks

an emerald drop anklet

I was trying to keep it simple.

Moirean · April 2013

My earthen description. No, not the one with the stone boobs. -_-

I am going for walking-soulstone-with-a-pinch-of-Imp.

She is a powerful Earthen and she stands rather tall, at a height rivaling a troll's, with a vaguely feminine silhouette. Fibrous strands of a pale mineral - likely some form of abestos, judging by the look - cover her head and fall down her back in a wispy float. Upon first glance, her body itself appears to be hewn from a featureless and blank inky stone, light seemingly swallowed by its flat, lusterless surface. Close inspection, though, reveals a startling depth to her rocky body, with deep blue striations, rutiles and swirls erratically twisting through the black stone. Underscoring these accents, tenuous tendrils of misty essence - somehow - appear to roil and churn in the depths of the stone, blooming upwards in disconcerting shapes eerily similar to gaunt faces, stretched in silent screams - as swiftly as these hints of images appear, however, before the eye can even focus on them, they fade, melting back into the core of the dark rock.

Sen · May 2013

what

Isto · May 2013

Why not.

[spoiler]He is a wise Yeleni who is built slenderly, yet not so as to appear skinny. The tips of his short, messy, blonde hair brush the six-foot-one mark. A strip of hair is missing, however, along the left side of his head. It stretches from his left temple, over his ear and down to the nape of his neck. Neatly inked in the bald patch is a series of interconnecting, branching, tribal swirls whose points fade into his hair as if anchoring in the flesh. The whole design has been made to look as if it were stemming from the base of his neck. As the tattoo reaches his temple it expands outward to cover his cheek in the pitch-black, tribal-based pattern. The swirls and branches over the side of his face lace together to form the overall image of a raven in flight. The uppermost wing overlaps his left eye, accenting his emerald-green iris, while the lower ends at his jaw line. His lips, while not overly full, tend to bear a slight quirk. Mixed with his casually indifferent stare is an aura of mischief, perhaps perceived in the set of his defined jaw or nearly always twitching fingers, to the backs of which a set of titanium claws have been fashioned. His shoulders, as with the rest of his lean form, aren't particularly broad, yet the musculature is well-toned from years of experience in combat. Protruding from his shoulders are a pair of wing stumps, still covered in raven plumage. Matching the stumps in his backs is the stump of what was once a tail, protruding just barely from his tailbone.[/spoiler]

Lin · May 2013

LINWULF

She is a dexterous Lupine, a muscular and disturbing marriage of wolf and something darker. She is considerably large, approximately seven feet from shoulder to rear. The face is elongated, sunken in places and extruded in others, only the very ancestral suggestion of a wolf, with a heavy lower jaw and deep, skull-like eyes of amber. Where the hollowed sweeps of her cheeks meet the curve of her neck, a pair of jagged horns flanks her head. A crest of thick, black fur begins at the top of her skull and extends the length of her back, a mane that covers the entire top portion of her body. The rest of her fur is a mottled white, gathered heavy in some places and sparse in others, seemingly at random. The beast's legs are grown over with unnatural mutations of bone, emulating the shape of a wolf's musculature, but warping it into weaponized exaggerations, the claws nothing less than skeletal blades, several inches long. Her tail almost doubles the length of her bulk; unlike a wolf's, it would look at home on a dragon or basilisk, ending in a rough barb. She walks with the blessing of Haern.

warped and twisted filigree horn ornamentations : (wrapped tight around her horns)
a circular mark, half darkened : (in the center of her forehead)

Emelle · May 2013

@Sen,

I really like your description! I've made a few suggestions below that I think would make it stronger. Most of them are stylistic and not grammatical, so they reflect my idea of style -- take them or leave them!

[spoiler]

Sen said:

Would love some feedback from anyone who has a little extra time!
She is a <blah blah> human and is ghostlike, possessed of fair skin with a ghostlike appearance. She is possessed of fair skin, and her lips and eyes are likewise sapped of color, the latter a subdued [I'm not sure this is the best word to use here, maybe something more along the lines of faded, washed-out, etc?] blue, indicative of blindness. Flanked by feathery blonde - almost white - hair that is almost white, her oval face contains refined features, chief among them high cheekbones, sloping eyebrows, and full lips. A delicate build is the last contributor to her seeming ethereality, with subtle curves mitigating a would-be angular appearance. Proof that she is tangible [This phrase seems a little counterintuitive to me. She's probably not transparent and could be bumped into in public, therefore proving she isn't a ghost. I like what you're getting at, but a different phrase might work better for you here.] exists solely in the puckered scar that stretches from her mouth to upper left cheek.

[/spoiler]

Aarde · June 2013

He is a clever Atavian. Dark of skin, he stands a bit taller than two metres. A pair of moss-green

eyes stare out over a prominent nose, and thin lips add to the rest of his facial features to give

him a solemn appearance. His hair is kept in a single clubbed braid, tied up shoulder-length. His

hands are calloused as if used to manual labour as opposed to scholarly work, though his nails are

kept clean.

It's a sad desc. Anyone able to improve it for me?

Meyvitch · June 2013

No, I think it looks fine. And rather hawt.

Aarde · June 2013

Piper · June 2013

I'd like a good bit of critiquing for Piper's Lycanthrope form. I'm pretty awful at describing wulf so any advice would be good.

Lycanthrope Slime Wulf Piper! Now with kung fu grip!

She is a powerful Lupine of a diminutive size, her body measuring no more than five feet from pointed nose to bushy tail. The color of her fur is like that of oil, never settling on any one tone for too long. In certain lighting, it appears to be a sickly olive-green color while other times show her to be as black as non-reflective coal. Bearing further similarity to oil, is the feeling of her fur. It is not specifically soft or course as much as there being a distinct sensation of touching sludge regardless of how perky the multiple rosettes and cowlicks visually seem to be. Her legs have the illusion of being stocky and short, this appearance due to the thickly packed muscles that have formed along each limb, and terminate in a typically-sized, claw-tipped paw. Where she does not look particularly threatening or ferocious. she makes up for looking resilient and strong.

Lin · June 2013

Piper said:

She is a powerful Lupine of a diminutive size, her body measuring no more than five feet from pointed nose to bushy tail. The color of her fur is like that of oil, never settling on any one tone for too long. In certain lighting, it appears to be a sickly olive-green color while other times show her to be as black as non-reflective coal. Bearing further similarity to oil, is the feeling of her fur. It is not specifically soft or course as much as there being a distinct sensation of touching sludge regardless of how perky the multiple rosettes and cowlicks visually seem to be. Her legs have the illusion of being stocky and short, this appearance due to the thickly packed muscles that have formed along each limb, and terminate in a typically-sized, claw-tipped paw. Where she does not look particularly threatening or ferocious. she makes up for looking resilient and strong.

"The color of her fur is like that of oil, never settling on any one tone for too long. In certain lighting, it appears to be a sickly olive-green color while other times show her to be as black as non-reflective coal."

The sentence construction "other times show her to be" should get a rewrite. You're adding a subject to the sentence (other times) and making it perform an action on the main subject (her, i.e. Piper). Unfortunately it doesn't make a lot of sense.

Suggestion: Simplify, don't get fancy. "In certain lighting, it appears to be a sickly olive green color, while other times, it is as black as non-reflective coal."

"Bearing further similarity to oil, is the feeling of her fur."

I'm not an English major here and so I don't know the rules of sentence fragments by heart, but I feel like you could join this into the next sentence.

Example: "Bearing further similarity to oil is the feeling of her fur, not specifically soft or..."

Honestly this is probably okay.

"It is not specifically soft or course"

Change "course" to "coarse".

"It is not specifically soft or course as much as there being a distinct sensation of touching sludge regardless of how perky the multiple rosettes and cowlicks visually seem to be."

This sentence structure is a mess, owing to your shifting of the subject at the end of it. You go from describing the fur to suddenly describing the "rosettes and cowlicks" of the fur, making for a confusing description. I get the spirit of what you're trying to say here, which is that no matter what bits of her seem soft or hard, it always feels like touching sludge. It just took me a while to figure out!

Suggestion: "Regardless of how perky the rosettes and cowlicks of her fur appear, it feels like sludge to the touch."

Of course, a little detail may be lost there, but again, it's only a suggestion.

"Her legs have the illusion of being stocky and short, this appearance due to the thickly packed muscles that have formed along each limb, and terminate in a typically-sized, claw-tipped paw."

In deconstructing this sentence, we learn (a) her legs are bulky and probably pretty wide-looking, so it skews her proportions and makes her look short (this is cute!) (b) they end in completely ordinary paws.

Again, we have an instance of confusing descriptors and a repeat of slightly shifting subjects. You declare the subject to be "her legs", then later reinforce the subject while changing it "along each limb". It's not invalid, but it is a little misdirecting.

Suggestion: "Her legs are packed thickly with muscles, making them look stocky and short as a consequence."

Honestly, I don't even think you need to mention the paws at all. Firstly, they don't have any distinctive features worth mentioning. Secondly, she's a wolf and the reader has probably heard of wolves, so the link is already made. Too many players have descriptions that read "her neck leads to her head" or "atop his nose is a pair of eyes" and I think that's just great, because if it wasn't mentioned there I'd assume we had a lot of deformed freaks running around! Sorry for the mini-rant, that's just a little nitpick of mine.

"Where she does not look particularly threatening or ferocious. she makes up for looking resilient and strong."

Comma instead of period. You might change one of the instances of "looking" so the sentence isn't repetitive.

Suggestion 1: "Where she does not look particularly threatening of ferocious, she makes up for with the appearance of resilience and strength."

Suggestion 2: "Though not particularly threatening or ferocious in appearance, she makes up for it by looking resilient and strong."

Macavity · June 2013

I will jump on this band wagon. to be honest I have issues writing these and try to stay with one for years! heh

look me

He is a powerful Earthen vampire and is an imposing figure. His body appearing to be eternally

cloaked in a veil of concealing shadow, leaving much of his features indistinguishable. The

most apparent is his capturing blue right eye, powerful inset under his eyebrows. His left eye,

however, has been wrapped in an earthen bandage, showing proof of the Blood Oath given to Lord

Ivoln for the Teradrim Guild. Visible out of the mysterious aura is his well-built frame,

standing in a commanding fashion that displays his status. Located at the end of a muscular

arm, a hand resides with only four fingers. The fifth has been decayed away, though doesn't

hold the tell-tale signs of youth. The remaining flesh appears to have been withered for quite

some time. Shadows collect around his lean legs, making one wonder which direction they will

carry him. Upholding a stance of mystery, he overlooks the land. He walks with the blessing of

Iosyne.

tenebrous Bloodloch Imperial Military spiked combat boots of the spider : (worn on the feet)

a pair of midnight black trousers : (worn on the legs)

a hood of elusion : (worn on head)

a Celestine invigorating enhancing mighty hardy cloak of a swirling sand : (hanging from the

shoulders)

an octagonal pendant : (around the neck)

an opalescent mask trinket : (worn on the cloak)

Angwe · June 2013

@Macavity I actually really like yr description when I read it. That said, the part about the blood oath you may want to think twice about, as it edges in on forcing knowledge on the viewer.

Macavity · June 2013

Angwe said:

@Macavity I actually really like yr description when I read it. That said, the part about the blood oath you may want to think twice about, as it edges in on forcing knowledge on the viewer.

yeah I thought that as well, and sort of threw that in, but I am open to suggestions on another way to put that so its not so forceful but still holds weight. Its sort of the RP behind how the Teradrim got Ivoln back as a Patron

Lin · June 2013

Just take out the disclaimer. Tell us what we're seeing. "His left eye is covered by a bandage." This way, you don't force us to know something we don't, and instead of having your eye explained, people can suddenly ask you about it!

Azton · June 2013

He is a dexterous Azudim Lord and quite dwarfish in his build: short, squat, and stocky. Though possessing a large, protruding gut, he's anything but obese or overweight - his arms and legs are like tree trunks, thick and solid, each wrapped with bands of corded muscle and leading to a broad chest and wide shoulders. Dark, suspicious eyes glare out onto the world, eyes that sit above a crooked, flattened nose - like it was broken one too many times and not quite fixed properly. His face is framed with a forest of rugged, dark red hair whose shaggy locks hang down to his shoulders and form a full, grizzly beard.

Draiman · June 2013

So I made a new character. 2 issues I always have with doing this are a) background and b) description.

He is a typical Human and is shorter than average humans. His scalp is just barely visible through
his almost shaved hair cut. His hair color is most evident in his light brown eye brows, resting
just above his brown eyes. Three scars on the lower left side of his face, reaching just to the
middle of his neck, distort the light tan of the rest of his skin with their white serrations and
corrupt what would normally be considered a handsome face. Lightly toned arms rest easily at his
side, small scars sliced here and there in no particular pattern.

Yeah I know I suck, but I'm trying

Lin · July 2013

Post-shadowpocalypse beefy Anfini:

He is a prudent Mhun, a lanky, well-cut man who must be seven feet tall, at the very least. He is peppered lightly with a long life's worth of natural scars, etched against corded musculature that defines his lithe shape. He tends to wear loose clothing, his shirt often unbuttoned, revealing the fat, circular scar just beneath his sternum, centered perfectly at the apex of his gut. His angular face is framed by a chaos of white hair, kept clean but handily neglected. Two narrow eyes, thin lips, and a long, patrician nose make his face knife-edged, handsome and boyish, but lined with marks of age. Where one of his eyes is a rich orange color, the other is dead, fogged over with cataracts, milky blue in coloration. He wears a smattering of piercings all over his face, silver rings or studs chosen at random, embedded into his eyebrows, nose, ears, or lips. He walks in the favor of Iosyne.

Angwe · July 2013

Room descriptions? Why not.

A gutted shack amid endless jungle.
You find yourself in the midst of a clearing in an unknown jungle, the scent of exotic flowers and decaying plantlife wafting on the rare breeze. Monstrously large insects whiz to and fro in the still, humid air surrounding what was once the ruins of a rusty shack. Stale water pools amid the mud and the rotted planks of wood that hint at the legacy if a floor underfoot, and what walls remain of the place are rotted and weathered. Likewise stained by rainwater and other, more questionable fluids, a makeshift table sits in the center of the destruction, the tattered remains of leather restraints still clinging to the bloated wood. Beyond, the jungle is an imposing and an ominous presence, teaming with unseen life both seen and unseen. The hunting calls of predators and the dying cries of prey fill the air, accompanied by the constant song of exotic birds and a strange drumming in the far distance, evidence of other folk somewhere in this place. Always, you hear a chanting in a guttural tongue that seems to surround this clearing, the exact direction somehow impossible to discern.

This is the newest iteration of Angwe's Haven, which may be somewhat recognizable to those who've had the, uh... pleasure of visiting what had previously sprung from his poor, tortured mind, or possibly to those who've visited Arythil.

Those who want to see his old Haven description are welcome to PM me.

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